Ode to The Train Wreck, as written by a fan

So great, we had to post it again. Thanks, Jimbo, Beck’s Official Poet Laureate!

By Jim B.

Oh, great mash up of bovine and swine

Tossed greasily on a crusty roll with more satisfaction than 1,000 feasts

But unbeknownst to the tongues of those Muslim, & Hindu, & Vegan, & Jew…

As your name may suggest, you are the very depiction of carnage (in the flesh)

Just as wearily eyes are incapable of looking away, so are the mouths of men of turning away

As they yearn hungrily for your sloppy, beefy, cheesy goodness

Your creamy mayonnaise runs deep, deep within your warm center of salami and fried onions

And it is an obtainable spoil for even Scrawny Arms Rob Lowe to enjoy with messy dignity

For it is not without great condiments that any man should be laid to rest

Deliciousness is often fleeting

But yours is not, and it sends quivers down the spines of all with hearty appetites

Be it Adam Richmond, or Kobayashi, or Scooby Doo

The best description of its flavor: DIVINE

The best description of your affliction: INTOXICATING

And alas, the best description of your status post sandwich: COMATOSE

P.S. The Gator Gumbo rocks as well.  It’s a spicy, smoky bowl of reptilian joy.